Gentler Communication: Understand a Type 2’s Thought Process

Looking to communicate better in your gentler way? Wondering how to connect with the quieter Type in your life?

Type 2 Communication: Strengths and Challenges

Today, we talk about the thought process of a fluid, flowing Type 2 person—the second of 4 Types in my Energy Profiling system. If misunderstood, a Type 2′s thought process can cause disharmony before communication ever starts.

Watch the video and discover two thought patterns that can challenge a more detailed, subtle person’s ability to communicate. Try out our two simple solutions to speak up and communicate without a lot of extra baggage.

Not a Type 2 yourself? Pay attention to tips to better understand one in your life:

How does this help you understand a fluid, flowing person in your life? Can you see this helping you communicate more true to your nature? Please share your positive comments.

Ask, don’t assume

Your assumptions can get the better of you. Before jumping to conclusions about someone’s behavior, ask all the questions that come so naturally to you.

If your communication with a Type 2 feels filled with a lot of extra, weighty emotion, stop discussing the point at hand and ask about the assumptions that person may have made about your behavior.

More communication support

Discover more patterns to help you better understand yourself and others with all the information in my Energy Profiling course. It will help you resolve conflict and experience more harmonious communication.

Best part? The Energy Profiling online course is free. Get it here.

The next video in the series: communication with Type 3’s.

Carol Tuttle

Carol Tuttle is a teacher, speaker, healer, and best-selling author of five books. She has dedicated her life to helping people worldwide create the lives and relationships they desire. She blogs to support you in creating your ideal life.

Tell Us What You Think

  • Angela

    I learned how to do this intuitively, years ago. I had post partum depression and found myself on anti-depressants. Being very in tune with my body and my thoughts, it wasn’t long before I found ways of dealing with it and was able to get of the anti-depressants within 3 months. Within a year, I felt completely back to normal.

    One thing I did was to go through my pile of worries the same way I go through a physical pile. Look at each one and honestly assess its function in my life. If I determined I had been holding on to it needlessly, I handed it to God in prayer and asked him to take care of it, because I didn’t feel able to handle it myself.
    Now, when I start to feel that familiar burden of a pile that has gotten too deep, I know exactly what to do. (Sometimes it still takes me a little while to recognize what’s happening.)

  • April

    I am a T2…..This is so true!

  • Ruth

    VERY helpful, Carol and Anne. Thank you!!! I am surrounded by T2s and I want to understand them AND honor them. Even learning to ask the “right” questions to help them feel safe and unearth those “emotional piles” will be helpful in our conversations and relationships.

  • Penni

    If only this was posted last night it would have saved a lot of aggravation!!! As a type 2 I do see that I have a lot of undercurrent thoughts. And as Anne stated I don’t always express those thoughts because I am afraid of hurting someone’s feelings, or another bigger issue for me, is that my thoughts (which are very logical to me but based on emotion) will be rejected…therefore I will be rejected. I also liked that you talked about piles of thought. An easier way for me to see my thoughts is that it is a complex matrix. I have matrices running through my head for almost everything that is going on in my life. As my hubby says, I have a back-up plan for a back-up plan for a back-up plan. In my head I can truly see step A to step B to step C, etc, and then if steps B & C are not needed step A to step D, etc…But everything is planned or thought through. If not it is complete chaos for me. My husband is a type 1/3 and is not structured in his thoughts. He will say whatever is on his mind and then my matrices of thoughts start to work for whichever direction he might take with his thoughts. Very tiring! Especially when his T1 random thoughts are not always expressed when he thinks he has stated something. Leading up to argument last night…We were cooking dinner. Made two pans of chicken enchiladas, but with our small oven we can only cook one at a time. Our family only eats one pan at a sitting, so my husband suggested we put one in the freezer for a later time. Fine with me as cooking it now or later didn’t make much difference. In my head I already had A-B or A-C matrices formed. So we went with the A-C matrix. I covered it, put it away, but when I turned off the oven after cooking the one pan, my hubby then asked why I wasn’t putting the other pan in…I thought we had just discussed this and the first matrix had been erased in my head!!! Oh, he had changed his mind and in his random thoughts he did not express those thoughts. After a big Napoleon Dynamite sigh, I got the other pan out and put in the oven. He sensed my undercurrent of unexpressed frustration (besides the big put upon sigh) and couldn’t understand why I was so upset. He says I’m nit-picky, but I like Carol’s word of “detailed”. Odd thing is, I am detailed in my thoughts, but my husband is more detailed in his physical space (his T3 is very dominant there). Odd, I just realized that. I cannot handle the “chaos” of unstructured thoughts and he cannot handle the “chaos” of unstructured space.
    As for getting rid of all our pile of thoughts that will not let us get back to the real problem, again I agree with Anne. “Chucking” is such a T3 word! Just saying it takes too much energy! I like her word of “flushing”…it has such flow! I find I solve all of my problems in the shower. The flow of water that rinses my worries and troublesome thoughts down the drain.

    • Gina

      I can sooooo relate to what you said here. My hubby doesn’t understand what gets me so upset in certain events or conversations such as these and it is difficult for myself to even explain to him why; which leads to explosive conversations. This is all very helpful! =)

    • Adhis

      And here I am thinking, “If your hubby wants a second pan of enchiladas, he can get up and put them in the oven himself!”

    • Katelon

      Sounds like mis-communication. Your husband probably figured, in his random thought process, that you cook the enchiladas first and then freeze them, but didn’t communicate that as he had already moved on to other thoughts (I’m a type 1), whereas you had pictured putting them uncooked into the freezer. So you both were concentrating on saving them for later, just had different ideas of what would happen before putting them in the freezer. As a type 1, I like to have people ask me questions if my thought process feels confusing to them and they don’t understand how they are connected…and I am happy to explain the thinking process to type 2’s and others who need a more linear understanding.

  • Kathleen

    So accurate! My husband is a T2 and he put it aptly the other day. He said, “I have a troubled mind.” I’ve been trying to help him see that it’s part of his natural movement to be a worrier and not to take it quite so seriously! Easy for me to say as a T1! Very helpful ideas for supporting the T2 energy. Thank you.

  • Courtney

    Love this! Great advice for my type2 family members and for me (type4) in loving them. Thank you!

  • Jolee

    I am either a 2/3 or a 3/2 and I can definitely relate to the undercurrent thoughts and the piles of worries. Understanding this is very helpful for me in managing my life. I will be thinking on this more. Sometimes it makes sense for me to burn the pile of worries and go back to the original one but I honestly there are times when new things come up that are worth addressing, but just not dwelling on all the time. Anyway, this is quite interesting to think on. This may answer my question about being a 2/3 vs. a 3/2.

  • Kerrie

    Thank you so much. As I listened to this it brought tears to my eyes. It answers so many questions for me and helps me understand why I have been so weighed down with worry my whole life. Thank you for the work you do. I’m going to go throw a bunch of worries away. 🙂

  • Barb

    Type 2 – I don’t look at my thoughts as worries, but as feeling “overwhelmed by responsibilities”. I have such difficulty focusing on one area, attacking that, and completing it. I see all the endless responsibilities that keep flowing into my life. Either I can’t begin by focusing in one area or I start and then more come and overwhelm me.
    On top of this, I have a secondary Type 4, so it is very difficult to do something with out a high degree of perfection.
    I feel “stalled”, not accomplishing anything. Not because of randomness or laziness. Just so overwhelmed by all the details and responsibilities. I wish for an eraser that could clear my mind each day.

  • Cindy

    I just listened to this again, and it always amazes how much, you, Carol and Anne, get me. Even more than I get myself. I have learned some about myself from you. This video has really helped me. I just quit my full time job. From the time gave my notice until now, I have been able to keep my “worry piles” under control. I start worrying about whether I’ve made the right decision and all the piles of “what if’s” start building, I just go back to why I made the decision in the first place–and feel those feelings–and I know quitting is right for me, and all the ‘worry piles’ dissappear. At least until I start the process over again. I also love the way you describe the “undercurrent” of thought. That is so me!! Thanks!!!!

  • Sydney

    My fiance is a T2 and he has both of these tendencies and has a hard time sharing but once he does he feels SO MUCH BETTER. These techniques would be very helpful for him I think.

  • Margaret

    I really what to make sure my Type is right. This video was so helpful. It is just one more validation that I am a Type 2. The undercurrent is so true, I never thought of it this way. For instance, with DYT, I was thinking what if I am not a type 2? I will buy the wrong clothes and waste so much money and time and I won’t be able accept my true nature. Also, I have been avoiding go to the doctor for a physical, worried about all the things that may go wrong, high blood pressure, diabetes (I am over weight), heart problems. Which means medications, diet restrictions and possibly surgery! Oh my, that is over whelming! So now, I will start being aware and flushing (love the word Anne) the piles and just go get the darn physical!

  • http://CarolBlog Diana

    This video was the perfect reminder of what I had already noticed was a tendency of mine, but had forgotten in the rush of life until it blew up last night.

    I’m a 2/3 and had realized earlier that when I let anxieties build up (my undercurrent flow gets blocked or dammed by my ‘piles’) it results in one of two things.

    A melt-down happens when the dam pressure finally overcomes the blockage and sweeps it away (this often happens from general life worries or when I live too much in my secondary 3 of go-go-go, trying to be superwoman).

    The other way is an outside catalyst (in the case of last night, family) triggers a fiery explosion of emotion (I have a fairly strong secondary 3) that blows the piles to kingdom come until I get to the bottom issue that started the blockage in the first place and then the tears come. Oh, do I ever feel bad after those moments.

    Time to notice those issues before they start to pile and not give my power to others. I have identified the issue that trigger my anxieties (our life is a mirror, right?)

    • Jared Wadman

      Thank you I appreciate your experience. I feel somewhat similar, but different. I feel I’m a 2,1. My piles start stacking mine are what if this or then that will happen. It happens very quickly. Alleviating the load is going to be great. Thanks again, Jared.

  • Tziporah

    I am a type 2. I have found over the years (I’m an “older” type 2) that “finding my voice” and “realizing that I deserve respect” have been themes in my life, and I am finally realizing those aspirations in actuality. I think that what Barb said about feeling overhwelmed may come from not understanding how important we are in this world–that our voices do matter. We don’t have to raise them; we just need to be able to say what we know (we do know our truth if we listen) in ways that are straightforward and kind. I have also come to believe that being ‘liked’ is not as important as being respected.
    We need to work towards ‘speaking our truth’ as well as dressing our truth!

  • Karen

    A great way for me to reduce the pile of worries and get back to the original concern is with JOURNALING. Three pages of free flowing words that don’t even have to make sense will usually help me get to the root of my worry. And/or envisioning the pile being dumped into a vat of white light.

  • Jared Wadman

    I love creating. I’ve been working on being my higher self, and connecting to my energy and vibrancy and the last part of my day was rough. I finally had a time to feel ‘how can I as a type to create peace again and feel more whole?” I than asked my angels to accumulate all of my ideas and fixed beliefs that are keeping me stuck. I than put the whole pile in a flowing river that is healing, life energy and the ideas or piles disintegrated into the light. The thought of putting all my ‘what ifs and then this will happen’ through this process is exciting to me. Thank you, Carol and Anne! Love, Jared.

  • Sandy

    Why worry when you can pray? Praying could be seen as a way to give the worries away…put them in the garbage.